2002-05-01 - 12:17 p.m.

Many Mundane Motives may Misrepresent my Mission: Milking Money Massively Mistakes my Meaning. Mitigating Missives Make me Mad. And so forth.

One day, I'm gonna write an intire entry of words beginning with the same letter. I think, If I stay within the passive voice, I can go on indefinately with 'M', but if I use the third person, 'P' would work just as well. And I would just like to point out that this is all done without the aid of a thesaurus: I live on the edge, baby. I live on the edge of forgetting how to be poetic, to use language for my own purposes. To Compensate, I have to Alliterate, or Hate the Fate I Ate. Say that Eight times fast :)

Anyway, I did have a purpose to this entry, glimpsed in a flash through the trees of alliteration, in this forest of free verse, on the way to my grandmothers house of relevance, pursued by the wolf of the absurd. Yesterday I became an actor.

To everyone writing me frantic messages, trying to pull me back from the abyss, or shove me on the boat that leads to purpose, you may relax: I ain't joining the Peace Corps. At least, not yet. Why, you ask? What could possibly have happened to make me reconsider? Cold Feet, oh Padraigeous One? Was this all a hoax? A desperate cry for help, or perhaps the result of a moment of thoughtful reflection? No, I tell you. The wanderlust and need to do good remain strong with me, and I want to join every bit as much now as I did when last I wrote. What has changed is my perception of my chances for getting anywhere in Acting, my love, my life. A sea change, no less: Eyes to Pearls, Of my bones are Corals made, etc. It turns out I have a voice. And an elusive quality called 'stage presence'. I am, in fact, almost perfectly devised for musicals.

Those of you who know me, and there are a few of you out there, are going to be laughing right now, and will not stop until you've had the chance to lambast me upon the pages of my own Sign-in-Book. I imagine the names 'Lloyd' and 'Webber' and 'Pansy Bitch' will be bandied about, and before that gets anywhere, I must protest: Actionhero, I still hate the bastard. I hate musicals, mostly. There are a few good ones, such as 'Sweeney Todd', or 'Miss Saigon', or 'Les Mis', but most musicals are the theatrical equivalent of Soap Operas and Pond Scum. Stagnation in its purest form. But, they are also the only fucking shows that Broadway seems to put on, so it's a good skill to have. Plus, I love having a voice I can use, and is good. And my voice is really good. All I need is a little training, but I have the projection, the diction, the sense of music, and the basic vocal cordinal tone for it. But what brought about this fundamental re-recognition of my own talent? Allow me to explain:

Last Teusday, I did a casting for a Volkswagon commercial. This you know. This was followed by my car breaking, but its fixed now, so no worries. I was feeling good. On Monday, I drove an hour and a half up to Stuart Florida, where I did an audition for a new Musical, called '1001 nights'. The composer/Lyricist is named John Mercurio, and on his web site, www.johnmercurio.com, are posted some clips from this show. The music is really good, and the script is incredible, and I was auditioning for the lead antagonist: the show parallels Scheherezade, and my character is the Sultan, basically. A Southern Gentleman in pursuit of a runaway slave in 1860. Benjamin Beauregard Anderson. Great name.

Either way, I screwed it up: the song I chose to sing was not well practised, and I didn't have the sheet music, and the piano player didn't know it, so I was singing while trying to figure out the key from her, while she was playing, trying to pick up the key and tempo from me. Total disaster. Anyway, the auditioner was this Mr. Mercurio (who, by the way, is really starting to build a name in NYC), and rather than kick me out with a 'next!' to the groin, he went to the piano, lead me through a quick vocal excersize, and we tried again, and I sounded great. They asked me to the call back, I went, had absolutely no competition acting-wise, but also had a better voice than the other two auditionees, who were both really good. I got the part.

So that was cool. Unfortunately, it's non-paying, but Mercurio's on board, and the director is a guy by the name of Andrew Kato, another budding name in NYC. He's assistant Producer on 'A Bombitty of Errors', a hip-hop Shakespeare production that's getting really good reviews in Manhatten. I've got an opportunity to impress people in NYC with this, people who may be able to get me work up there, so I'm happy. It would mean quitting work, tho, so I'd need another source of income.

Enter my next audition, for a production of 'The Hobbit', in Coral Gables. It's being done by the actor's playhouse, the biggest independant theater in South Florida. www.actorsplayhouse.org. It pays, for rehearsals and performances, and it doesn't conflict with the show in Stuart. Basically, I'll have myself an acting day-job if I get it. And I have every reason to believe they'll cast me.

My audition rocked. I did Herod's Song from Jesus Christ Superstar, and I rocked. Loud, clear, tremolo, growling, spitting, everything. It was a performance. The monologue went well, too. The accompanist looked impressed, and said 'Good Job' when I got my sheet music back from her. The director asked me why he hadn't seen me before, and seemed generally pleased to have found me. It was all good. Afterwards, I went to visit Yolandi Hughes, artistic director for another good theater down here, Dreamer's Theater. They are the ones who are doing the Camus play with all women. They're getting great reviews, too. She immediately recognized me, gave me a kiss on the cheek, etc, and asked me what I was up to. She also told me to go talk to Rafael De Acha at the New Theater, the other really good theater down here. So I have an entree with all three good theaters, possible contacts with NYC people, will be starring in a musical, and will most likely by earning a living as an actor by June.

Life is Good.

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